Waking up

I woke up quite un-peacefully this morning.  It was almost nightmare-ish as I saw him in my dreams, knowing that it wasn't real and wasn't right.

It's funny because I am not necessarily holding on to anything but at the same time, I miss the friendship that I had with him, his companionship.  After all, that was my intent when I initially met him over two years ago, a friends.

I just took my medicine.  I realized that my lack of not taking it this morning and waiting this late was starting to mess with my head.  I am trying my best and the good thing is I have something to do today.  It'll keep me pre-occupied.

I need to remember I have some action items that I need to work on and get working on it.  I think this weekend has been good for me and allowed me the opportunity to know what I am and am not ready for.