I am the beholder of my own happiness

so this spring break has been interesting...I got to
- hang out with friends
-make news ones
-get in touch with old ones
-realize i'm becoming an old lazy fart
-come to terms that i have a bit of a shopping habit
BEYOND MANY OTHER THINGS

during long late night conversations and long smokey conversations over drinks, i realized that i truly do believe i am the beholder of my own happiness. the only time i'm sad is when i think too much and let my happiness depend on someone else!

sometimes it makes me wonder if i'm ready for another relationship or even if i want a relationship. i know what kinda person i am and that means YES, a bf would be nice. but i dont know if im ready (or willing) to let another person into my life that could possibly break my heart. (yes i realize that it provides quite a predicament!) i keep my hopes up for the wrong reason (which leads to TONS of disappointment!) YUCK!

so here's my plan...i'm in a happy place because i am happy! anyone, thing, event that comes into my life is only there to ENHANCE it!

with those final words, i bid adieu! till next time!