UPDATE: things only get weirder
so after hearing some insider information, i realized that im definitely NOT the problem. . .apparently there are greater demons to defeat to get to the answer! i honestly cant say i know him. .. i never did too! he did. . .its funny because the one time i was confronted with someone tellin me that ("i never said i knew you"), it REALLY hurt! i guess i have some time to figure out who he is. . . and even if i am still and always just a friend (which i'm content with) maybe i'll be able to help him a little bit. . .as a friend =)