im INSANE
so i was kinda disappointed for all the wrong reasons last nite. . . i read into words too much. . . i need to learn that people talk too much crap sometimes with no meaning behind their words. . . some say things to please others' ears. . .others just have oral diarrhea. . .but thats beside the point. . . i think i take what people say to heart too fast and its actually fairly detrimental in the end. i mean, what does it mean when someone says they consider you a good friend? i guess its just like when someone says "i love you" depending on the context, it can mean a lot of things. like i know there are people i love in the way i love my dog, my shoes, my family and the one. various degrees and levels. . . so it just depends how you interpret things. . and apparently i SUCK at interpretting people. . (i guess that proves i'm NOT a mind reader!)
another query. . .if a drunk man's words are a sober man's thoughts, what the F*CK are guys thinking sometimes?? im still trying to figure that one out!! i think i've met my college challenge. in middle school, it was freakin TREE! (for the people who've known me FOREVER, that'll make TONS of sense!) now, i'm having issues with a palm. . . tree that is. . hahaha (there are actually multiple similarities. . its kinda crazy!!)
sometimes i think about things and i realize, i should just drop it and move on like i did with monsieur tigre. . .life was easier then when i did that. . .its just time to accept the fate of the situation and just mosey on down the road of life. . .i dunnoooo. . .maybe the search is really not happening right now. . disappointing, yes. . .but life goes on. . .i think reality may have set in. . .and ehh. . .its not too bad . .i mean a couple of days ago, i wrote about how much i was content with my life. . and i STILL am. . . i just need to remind myself everything is gonna be okay :-)
oh yeah, i went to the trail of lights. . still didnt go under the big christmas tree. . .maybe i need to make a trip out and do that. . twirl a couple of times and see what happens. . . apparently the actual trail isnt as exciting as i thought it would be. . but maybe thats cuz i felt kinda rushed and there were too many people around to actually take in the sights! maybe i'll get another chance. . . i hope. . .