Meaning thru Song
instead of talking about my thanksgiving weekend (which was good) i've decided to just put up song lyrics. i think this song just says it all sometimes. . . .

It Only Hurts When I'm Breathing
by Shania Twain and RJ "Mutt" Lange

Hope life's been good to you
since you've been gone
I'm doin' fine now - I've finally moved on
It's not so bad - I'm not that sad

I'm not suprised just how well I've survived
I'm over the worst, and I feel so alive
I can't complain - I'm free again

And it only hurts when I'm breathing
My heart only breaks when it's beating
My dreams only die when I'm dreaming
So, I hold my breath - to forget

Don't think I'm lyin' 'round cryin' at night
There's no need to worry, I'm really all right
I've never looked back - as a matter of fact

And it only hurts when I'm breathing
My heart only breaks when it's beating
My dreams only die when I'm dreaming
So, I hold my breath - to forget

It only hurts when I breathe

Mmm, no, I've never looked back -
as a matter of fact

And it only hurts when I'm breathing
My heart only breaks when it's beating
My dreams only die when I'm dreaming
So, I hold my breath - to forget

Hurts when I'm breathing
Breaks when it's beating
Die when I'm dreaming
It only hurts when I breathe

A CatchUp Update
Wednesday Dallas was TONS of fun. . . dance a little, met TONS of people. . first time i thought a jager bomb was good! had tons of fun. . . totally awesome girls nite! oh yeah, never has covered and smothered tasted sooo good!
Thursday Happy Birthday to my lil sis! Another nite out .. this time to BoYz CellaR! dayam!! so it was my first time at a gay club. . and it was kinda fun. . .different though. gotta see the strip-off which was interesting. . .lets say i wouldnt mind doing it again but it wouldnt be an all the time kinda deal. . . also went to this new bar named Oslo. . .was really cool looking. .really wasnt feeling the music as much but there's more about Oslo on sat nite!
Friday tryin to recover from the previous two nites. . or maybe just tryin to recover from wed nite! so nice nite in :-)
Saturday watched some football (OSU lost to Michigan so Texas is moving up!), did TONS of work. . . and then ANOTHER girls' nite out! went with some friends to Oslo. .was TONS of fun. . .it was AWESOME music!! TONS AND TONS of fun!
Sunday just a down day. . .didnt do much. . just veg. . veg veg veg!!

and that was my end of the week. . .today so far as been slow but you know, i'm excited. . gonna be back in houston tomorrow and i'll be at the new house! yeah! happy times! time to DECORATE! :-) okie well in case i dont get back to blogging anytime soon HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYONE and make sure to drive safely wherever you go!!

Gonna be a Hata!
so today i went to the extra credit for human sexuality since i made a low grade on my last test. . apparently i should consider reading the book or something since i dont know everything! (DUH!) so i was sitting there patiently and what not for the video to start because i was SUPER tired and stuff and this asian guy sits next to me and i look up and notice that he was wearing a marroon hat. wondering what school it was, i looked up and it was an OU cap! my initial reaction: WTF?!?!?! soo it made me just sit there and think "wow! this guy gots some major balls to be wearing a OU cap at UT" and then it makes me wonder, are there any OU students that are big enough UT fans to wear a UT cap on campus? furthermore, i wonder if this guy gets any shiet for wearing an OU cap. . .. but yeah. . just makes me wonder a lil bit. . but if you wanna know his name, JUST ASK! (i found out when we switched papers to check the answers from the quiz post-movie) i did the directory thing and apparently there are TONS of people with the same name. . .thats what happens when the perpertrator is a Nguyen. LOL! oh well. . .just had to put that out there. . cuz really.. WHY WOULD YOU WERE OU STUFF WHEN YOU GO TO UT? did you just REALLY REALLY wanna go to OU and couldnt get in? cuz dood! how did you get in here if you couldnt get in there? hmmm. . makes a person wonder. . .LOL

a LATE weekend update
well i definitely had a fun weekend! UT beat Texas Tech BARELY at the last minute 43-40. it was UNdoubtably the most exciting football game i've ever seen!! with a lil over 2 minutes left, Texas was down by 5 points and Mack Brown puts it Chance Mock, after being benched the ENTIRE game. in about a minute and a half, he leads the team down the field, 85 yards to throw a touchdown pass to BJ Johnson. . i REALLY close pass that he almost dropped! (oh yeah, cant forget the *i think* 54 yard pass to Roy!!) it was insane!! when they got the touchdown, EVERYONE in the stands was jumping up and down, screaming, hi-fiving and hugging one another! it was just intense!! i have to say, that was a good way to end the last home game for the senior football players and that was definitely a good last football game to watch as a UT student! it was awesome

well outside of the game, my weekend was good. went to Fado's which was fun, it was a little different being around people who knew OMD when it was NOT a retro cut on the radio! =X did some bowling sunday nite and got myself a bowling injury from pulling up the bumpers! unfortunately, you should NEVER grab the bumpers further than the first rung!! OUCHIE!

i've been watching a lot of Britney things. . .her interview and her lil special today . . or at least i caught part of it. i like her song "Everytime." i dont really think it applies to me in anyway BUT i like the piano that goes along with it (maybe i'll try and learn it sometime since its pretty easy) just makes me think about a lot of things i guess. . .

everytime i try to fly i fall
without my wings i feel so small

i really do think the song is about Justin. . .evidently i have no reason to have such a song representing some part of my life but it just gets me thinking. . .thats it. . .just thinking. . .

OH YEAH!! prior to the weekend (last thurs) i went to midnite rodeo! was pretty fun!! got reaquainted with the two step but i need more practice so that twirling is fun! =) just enjoying myself until graduation. . .

One day at a time, one step at a time. . just tryin to keep a smile on my face. . .

*insert picture of a big dark rain cloud here* =(
im sure this is soo going to be a reversal and unexpected change in my blogs but i guess i need to vent since apparently i cant sleep! so i've been crying. . ."why?" you may be asking. . . HONESTLY, i'm not really sure. i think lately i've just been feeling a little bit more lonely than usual. i guess there's just so many things that i wish were in my life. ironically i think my happier times are when i'm in houston. being in austin doesnt have the same appeal anymore. . .i mean, im basically alone. i dont have the same network of people like i did last year. maybe thats what the big change in me over the past year really is. i'm not the same Jane i use to be. when things from the past come prancing along, it hits me like a brick wall and right now, i'm suffering. . . BADLY! i HATE crying, esp when there's no one here to comfort me. i HATE feeling sad, esp when there's no one here to talk about it with. i HATE feeling alone, esp when there are tons of people that are just a phone call away. it just kinda sucks and i dont know really whats there to do. i mean, i guess, honestly, i have been putting up this front about how "happy, cheery" (and any other positive, go-lucky word that works) i am! when it comes down to it, i just wanna be done with school and outta here!!! i almost think that i'm REALLY sad. . .if you get what i mean. . . i wont go as far as sayin what i think right now. . but i dunno. . .i just feel like the big dark rain cloud from the old prozac ads in magazines. . .or the slumpy tree before the christmas lights during the holiday season. . . whatever it is, i'm obviously sad inside and its not going away anytime soon. . .

reflections from watching maury
so i'm watching maury right now and the show topic is "30 men tested and still no daddy for your baby" YUP thats right. . .big numbers rite? soo they were talking about this one lady who had 8 men tested over a period of 5 shows for 3 different kids. . .and in result, she only found the father for her youngest daughter who's 3 years old. . .yeah, lucky number 8! soo they updated the chick's story and it turned out that she's NINE MONTHS PREGNANT and doesnt know who's the baby's daddy is and will be back for ANOTHER paternity test! IS THIS CRAZY OR WHAT?!?! so in resolution i've decided to be a version of the comma fairy (what the english teacher calls a student who likes to put commas everywhere in their writing). i think its time that i be the *drum roll* CONDOM fairy. there would be a lot less fatherless kids, less governmental stress. . .ect. as the condom fairy, i would also be doing my part in population control! LOL. . .i guess i know what i wanna be next halloween! =)

time for fun!
so after some thought (but not TONS of thought), i've decided that its time to finally let go and enjoy myself!! YUP, i said it, TIME FOR FUN! and when i say fun, i dont mean anything bad. . i just mean its time i just enjoy myself and my last year here in austin. . . *sniff sniff* i mean, there's so much i havent done here and so little time left to do it!! i'm coming upon my last football game as a student but i might go home to houston to tell the parents move if they can close the new house this weekend. . . *sigh* so much to do!! i think i've just been a little uptight and now that i've realized it, i just need to relax and not worry too much anymore!

memory lane con't
so i meant to put this part in last nites random shiet entry but i forgot so i decided to add it in today. . so while i was at the mall i cruised the disney store and started checkin out what they had. . . and while checkin out snowglobes, the mini-ones. . i saw that they had my cinderella one again .. the jewel snowglobe. . and boy did a rush of feelings come about. . .it was crazy. . weird feelings all over. . .i dunno. . .maybe its random but i dunno. . hopefully one day cinderella snowglobes will have no emotional attachment to me. . . =\

Random Shiet
Football: So UT beat OSU (oklahoma state) today, 55-16 today. . which is good. . .i was watchin updates today and there's gonna be some movement in the top 10 because Virginia Tech and Miami both lost this week .. but MAN!! one funny thing was the multiple a$$ rippings that A&M got from OU today. . 77-0!! after seeing that i didnt feel too bad about Dallas. . .
Life: So i had a full weekend. . reaquainted myself with 6th street. . its been a while but it was fun. . .i also went to this place on 5th called the apple bar. . pretty cool place. . .according to a certain person, i'm old for goin there. . LOL. . its only because HE's old! LOL. . but anyways. .
THE KICKER so like i really like friendster because it gets ya reconnected to people that you havent talked to in YEARS or whatever else. . and so i was accepting a testimony when i saw that i had a new friend request so i checked it out. . and OMG. . .it happens to be a BLAST FROM MY PAST. . my first juvenile heartache!! can you imagine? someone that called me a biatch when we were barely in our teens. . and that i havent spoken to in like 7-8 years and i'm gettin a friend request from the dude?!?! LOL. . .i wish i had a camera when i opened the page cuz the expression on my face was probably priceless!! well i did some research and read some of the shiet people wrote about him. . i'm assuming all these people are good friends of his. . no random requests like me. . .and seems like he is a good guy. . .just wasnt that way to me when we were younger. . .oh well. .some people are immature. . but the question now is. . do you add a person like that? SEND ME YOUR SUGGESTIONS!

WeekEnd UpDate!
The UT vs Nebraska game: Texas win 31-7. it was a really good game for both V. Young and C. Benson. . both clocked in over 150 yards rushing each. i was really elated because I had fears that we might lose. . .but thank goodness we didnt!! i was gonna make it a big sports day and watch the orange and white scrimmage but my azn sensation friend was nowhere to be found after the game! but we did end up hanging out later. . .attempted the ghetto walmart swap but apparently walmart is getting strict and their employees are skurred! but in the end, there was some matrix reloaded watching. . . i have to admit, i'm thoroughly confused! maybe this sci-fi thing doesnt flow for me. . i dunno. . or maybe i just need to watch it multiple times and allow it to clarify itself for me!!

well one of the topics du jour yesterday was slang that we dont understand. . .apparently since i'm not as cool as i give myself credit for (hahaha), i dont know a lot of slang! one of the key words that troubled me throughout middle school was "jock." as a naive middle schooler, i spend time using my learned english skills of context clues to figure out what this meant. . .
she's on his jock
stop jocking that chick!
he jocks her big time
well as a young 12 yr old, the transitioning of the word from a noun to verb trouble me. . .but overtime i came up with my theory on what it meant. . .*ahem* you might be doing and wondering "so what DOES she think it means?" LOL .. . to this very day, i believe i got the meaning down! =) i've made it into adulthood without any troubling slang memories. . so where did this all stem from? it started when i was asked, "do you know what 'whoop-doop' means?"

CAUGHT!
So normally i would never post this kinda thing up but after last nite's happenings. . and i mean LATE nite happenings, it makes me kinda wonder. . . what does it mean when you have a dream about getting caught with someone? im sure its sooo juvenile of a dream because im an adult so how on earth could i get caught when i dont live out home!! makes you wonder huh? hmmmmm. . .something to ponder!