MY PHONE WORKS!! YEAH!! =D

correction: the UT-Tulane score was 63-18. . . my bad!

weekend events and realizations
so yesterday Texas beat Tulane, 62-18 i think. . . it was such a bad game in the sense that it got dayam boring after halftime since we were winning by so much!! a lot of people left early, understandable, but dayam. . .i hope we can hold up agst other Big 12 people starting next week!! lets hope so!

well maybe this is all depressing stuff but i dunno. . .i think i'm better when i'm NOT in the state of like. . . i think it takes too much energy out of me! LOL!! but yeah, watever! i think i feel this way cuz i'm not gettin the emotional feed that i want! too many expectations? maybe. . .NEVER!

last nite was the first nite i've been out in a LONG time! it was kinda cool. . .i became a somewhat football groupie. . LOL. . i met the asian ftball player. . it was funny cuz apparently he hangs around with some elsik people so i got to play catch up! but that was fun! i'm still sufferin from a slight headache. . NEVER have a L.I.T. when you havent had anything to eat in 12 hrs! oy!!

i think i'm burning bridges. . .wat a pyro! dammit! =/

phone still doesnt work! SUX!

i still love MICHAEL BUBLé <~~i dunno how to capitalize the E with the accent!

just a couple of things on my mind
my phone is messing around with me. . its not working right now so dont bother calling. . hopefully it'll be fixed by morning come!

at first it was cute, then it became an endearing quality and now its almost flat out annoying. . i think im startin to feel UNappreciated. im tired of always calling now! i dont deserve this kinda crap! i've done it before and i dont care to do it again!!

oh yeah, someone was knocking on my window earlier tonite. . .i got kinda freaked out. . i really wonder who it was. . but then again, maybe i dont!

on a sad note, i dont think i'm ever gonna use the whole jacuzzi function of my tub. . . i ended up having a wet bathroom. . water sprayin EVERYWHERE! =( what to do! (not use the jacuzzi i guess!)

i dunno why the link wont show up but just for you curious people, in case it never shows it the website for Michael Bublé is http://www.michaelbuble.com/ ENJOY!

I think i'm in LOVE
the more i listen to Michael Bublé, the more i fall in love with his music and his voice! such a smart idea to remake all these classic songs! he is a modern day Frank Sinatra (not that anyone could ever replace Ole Blue Eyes!) you shoud check out his website those pictures, the voice, those eyes! *sigh* check it out ladies! =)

The Bachelor
its BOB!!! so its another season of The Bachelor and WOW! these girls REALLY like him. . . Heather, one of the girls who didnt get picked was bawling and falling apart when he didnt pick her! i dont get it! how can you get your heart broken so quickly? wats the deal girls?!?! sometimes when i'm watching this it makes me think that these women are going in for their last calls! biological clocks are ticking!!! well anyones, my favorties: Lee-ann, the teacher who's soo cute; Estella, the ball of nerves, her nervousness is soo sincere!; and Karin, the confidence powerhouse! its nice to know that at least 2 out of 15 of the people are minorities! yeah! but dude! these previews are really scary! wats the deal with the hospital and ambulance?!?! and with all this making out that Bob's doing in the previews, maybe he isnt as a good boy as i thought!! i mean, football player, frat boy, possibilities for scandalous stuff??? hehehe. . just gonna have to watch and see!!!

something short, something funny
today is a day i never thought would ever come! more like i thought i would never say such a think in class. . well anyways, here's the story! today in human sexuality, Dr. Brownstein finished up his lecture on the historical perspective before beginning his lectures on anatomy and physiology. after giving some random factoids and what not, he went around getting students to say "my penis or vagina is a miracle!" being that i sit near the front, i got to be one of those lucky students to do this. . .so in my sick and nasaly voice, i said "my vagina is a miracle!" haha something that you'll probably never hear me say in a classroom of over 100 people again!

A Recent Discovery!
i was watching the sharon osborne show and she had this singer Michael Bublé on. . .i liked his sound so decided to look him up. . (PLUS he's a cutie!) he's a Canadian singer. . .pretty cool. . has that classic Sinatra kinda sound. . pretty nice. . .go check him out!!

ehh. . .
i dunno. . .im not too happy right now. . .i feel like he doesnt understand me to well. . .i really dont like that i feel like this. .i mean, how can you feel two conflicting feelings at once! he tells me that i can call at anytime but i dont feel like thats the case. . .i feel like im being treated like a young child who doesnt know anything. . and i dont like it because i'm NOT a young child and i DO know things! hopefully one day, he'll understand that too

Go A-Team!
so i spent the weekend in Port Aransas for class. .pretty fun spending time with my future teacher classmates. . it sucked that it RAINED the whole time there. . on and off of course, but it rained the whole weekend nonetheless. . got wet a lot which sucks since i'm still sick but hopefully i'll slowly feel better! i think i'm in phase three: coughing but at lesat i'm NOT constantly coughing! i did get to know a lot of people better. . .means i need to continue broadenin my friend scope. . .you learn a lot of things when you talk to aquantances and slowly make them friends! oh yeah, i've never thought electrical tape could be so fun! =D

I lost. . =(
so maybe it wasnt a war after all. . .maybe im a little more cynical for my own good! but outside of that, i caved! i just didnt understand it. . .how could i let it go two days!! (yes i'm f*ckin' weak!) but yeah, i dunno. . .im about to be lost to the other side! gonna have to be careful now so that i wont be swallowed in and be in too deep!!

Let the war begin!
so to my disappointment, i didnt receive a call tonite =/ i'm not sure if thats because there's still some anger looming over me and the other party from the other nite or what! in a way, i think a little war has begun!! who can hold out longer! normally i would CRACK but this time, NO!! if anything, i made the effort to try to resolve things and now it seems like its a game of immature minds! LOL (that would include me huh? =X) who knows!! maybe things will happen for the better in the end. . . doesnt mean that it has to go the way i want though. . .

LOAD OF CRAP!!
ENOUGH!! after last nite, i realized i've had enough! (maybe its because i'm sick and thus a tad on the emotional and whiney side but OH WELL!!) sometimes when you want something so much the first time you come close to it, you just swoop it up and hope that its the way you want it to be!! in the process, you may possibly overlook things that you would never give a second chance! something to think about. . .

also, is it better to look at the world from a cynical point of view to protect yourself or is it essentially bad because then you protect yourself from the good and the bad. . .who knows!!

blah blah blah!

FEAR
for those of you who keep up with my life by reading my blog, the following may be shocking because of the lack of details BUT if you REALLY know me, you'll be able to make sense of it anyways! so the last (almost) week has been EXTREMELY interesting for me, good interesting though. but at the same time, its hit some really deep inner chords with me and thus causing a bit of confusion too! at times, oddly enough, i feel torn between letting myself have something that makes me happy and letting myself be miserable (or not soo miserable but just stay on steady safe ground!) its funny because i havent felt this way in a while. . and its kinda nice. just scary. . .really scary. . but as i quoted before and i'll quote it again, there is nothing to fear, but fear itself. well just have to see how long i'll last before i scare the crap out of myself!

Critical Thinking
"what is it about love that makes you so stupid?" ~ Under the Tuscan Sun
wat is it that makes us act the way we do? i REALLY wanna know! if anyone ever figures out, TELL ME! feel free to contact me in any way, fashion or form!

sad days
*John Ritter died thurs nite. . .it was a sad day. . i loved him in Three's Company and apparently he was pretty good in 8 Simple Rules. . . too young, too soon! he was only 54. . like 10 days or so shy of his 55th bday!
*John Cash died thurs nite too. . .of complications from diabetes! sad. ..he became popular again via a Nine Inch Nails song remake. .got nominated for VMAs! he was 71.
*Saturday's ftball game: (5) UT vs Arkansas. . .offense wasnt connecting, defense was on vacation ..we loss by 10, 38-28. =( definitely a sad day today!

on a slightly happy note, i'm experiencing oatmeal again. . dont ask if you dont know!

Random Musings
tomorrow is the 2nd anniversary of September 11. I dunno how i feel but then again, i wasnt there so its not as traumatizing for me. I hope nothing bad happens tomorrow. All these video threats can be kinda scary. . .hopefully no one dies. . why cant the world just be a little bit peaceful again!

oh yeah. . .i just wanna be loved *shrug* it's weird to feel the way i do. . .kinda hard to explain but it's okay. . i'm sure i'll figure things out in time. . .

like they say. . ."there's nothing to fear but fear itself."

SCARY!!!!
so sometimes its nice to have things that remind you of back home, unless its SCARY! so as i was sittin at my computer just chattin and watchin my family feud, i heard a loud "sound". . . sounded like a gun shot. . lets hope it wasnt!!! maybe it was like a blowout or something.. i dunno. . just proves that riverside IS the ghetto. .oh well. . only till the end of may!!

a little late. . but WATEVER!
soo because i know i'll never get to someone's apt who has MTV, i decided to search for the madonna/bntney/christina/missy thing. . so i DLed and watched it and DAYAM!! no wonder there was soo much talk about it. . i guess after it was out that Brit was no longer a virgin, she was gonna go all out. . but i think it was dayam funny when they showed Justin's face. . hehe. . .but i'm kinda disappointed that they didnt show the kiss with Christina better! LOL. . but yeah. . now i'm up to date with current pop culture until something else happens!

Labor Day Fun
in efforts to forget how my morning started, i decided to go to the mall and forget all my troubles! ended up gettin new shoes, which is good! gotta retire my other shoes, esp after the football game! i also saw Le Divorce. . .it was pretty entertaining. had my little kick of french and everything. .. so that was fun! but overall. . that was fun! unfortunately because of my outings, i didnt do any work. . kinda sucks but life goes on. . .there are probably other unfortunate things but hopefully i can work those out tomorrow :-)

One Dream, MAJOR Setback
i think this is probably the worst way to wake up. . .to what was a good dream (maybe in the beginning of 2001), turning into my worst nightmare come true!! everything was perfect, i was back with the one person i've really truly loved, kinda a surprise since he came to find me. everything was great, we were planning to spend a whole week together when something overcame him which caused him to changed his mind, leaving back to his home, and me, waking up startled because my heart, broken again, but only in my dream. . .it was really weird. . i dunno. . maybe its a sign of some type! who knows of what though!! sometimes i wish this part of my life was resolved. . . maybe then i would sleep better. . .