so i chickened out last nite. . didnt have the guts to really tell him what i really wanted to say, well at least not face to face. . *sigh* i did get to email him with most of what i was thinking. .he told me he would send me a long email explaining stuff i guess. . . which works. . lets just hope it happens. . .if it doesnt, well. . .i dunno what then! i keep on lookin at Stitch and thinkin "wow! this is great! the first time ever that i've gotten what i wanted for christmas from a guy i actually like!" tells you what kind of crappy guys i've dealt with in the past! in a way, i'm grateful. . i guess from the start, i've kinda been amazed at my luck with meeting such a nice guy! yup. . i could be blowing up the ego but its true. . .but yeah, i guess i've become accustomed with realizing that i'm not that lucky. . most guys that i think are nice end up being one of two things: a jerk or too good for me. . .but yeah. . enough bashing on myself! ~~lets see. . i've been goin crazy because i live with someone whose incapable of keeping her pets in a dayam cage so i've got a wild black gerbil running around the place!! gotta find it before it wrecks the apt and chew through EVERYTHING!! i was about to shoot it DEAD last nite cuz it was in my room!! NOT COOL! but hopefully we find this rat bastard before everyone leaves to austin .. dont worry, i'll have some strong words to share later!! okie well. . thats it for now. . time to clean up and find this bastard!!